Script:
E= Erzulie, PG= Papa Ge, A= Asaka, Ag= Agwe
Scene 1:
*Scene opens with Agwe and Asaka sitting at their desks. Agwe is throwing paper balls into a waste paper basket in front of Asaka’s desk. Asaka is not-so subtly glaring at Agwe. Erzulie walks in.*
E= Busy, busy day, today! Is everyone as excited as I am?!
Ag= *sarcastically* I’m super excited!*claps in Erzulie’s face*
PG= Yippee.
*Erzulie looks to Asaka, but Asaka just shrugs her shoulders*
E= You’re all such Debbie Downers. Asaka, you’d look so much prettier if you’d smile. *A elicits a small grin* And then maybe a little contour- ooo- and some shading on your eyebrow-
Ag= Don’t be silly, Erzulie. Not even makeup can fix that. *A puts on strong face, but reaches for tissues and wipes her tears*
E= Agwe, you and that attitude are going to ruin my nice day! I’m so tired of you! You and your stupid storms have been ruining everything! The poor Darajeye wedding was ruined by one of your ridiculous typhoons just last week!
PG= They won’t have to remember it for long. Pneumonia’s a killer.
E= Oh, gosh….(bell dings) Mail’s here! (retrieves mail from portal) Here you go Papa Ge, and another for you Asaka, and then one for Agwe- and I mean one- and the rest are for me.
Ag= I have another one for you.
E= And why do you have mail for me?
Ag= It’s a personal request.
E=*hums. opens envelope and reads letter before gasping* What have you done? I can’t- why would you- I had planned for- I- I-I- YOU! I have been planning the Galimar wedding for centuries! I had timed it perfectly- there were going to be magnolias and her cousin was going to come and Andrea was going to look beautiful in white and Daniel was going to be so happy, but you, you slimy, seaweed-covered...(can’t find a word for a moment) Walrus!
A= Walrus?
E= I swear, Agwe, I will-
A= Erzulie, it’s all right. I’ll make sure the magnolias are still in bloom. *Erzulie takes deep breath and sighs.*
Ag= *mutters* So now you’re working. *Both Erzulie and Asaka send him pointed looks*
A= It will all work out Erzulie. Don’t worry. *smiles at Erzulie but when E sits down in her chair, A turns to Agwe and angrily points at him* You’ve gone too far with all of these storms of yours. You shouldn't have interfered in her department. *deep breathe* Whatever happened between us, you shouldn’t have let it-
Ag= Whatever happened?!
A= *shushes him* Quiet down. You’re making a scene, but it’s not like I should be surprised.
Ag= Are you serious?! I can't believe you. You're so- *becomes angrier and angrier. Thunderclaps and rain can be heard and the lights will dim. Asaka sighs and sits down at her desk. Erzulie freaks out and runs around aimlessly for a solution. Papa Ge slowly works over, grabs the water bottle off of Agwe’s desk and dumps it on his head. Storm promptly stops.* Hey-
PG= *holds up finger, checks Bluetooth and sighs* Now I have to go clean up your mess- again.
A= Like that's unusual.
PG= Pot meet kettle. Starvation has become the third most likely cause of death* Agwe says ha* Right after drowning. *Asaka sticks her tongue out at Agwe. PG gets another message* There’s another four dead in the Antilles. *goes to leave* I'll be back in a few. *exits*
E= *finishes furiously typing* That's settled then.
Ag= What’s settled?
E= I just resolved a little mixup. Someone from another department made a mistake.
Ag= What did you do?
E= I'm not a big fan of interdepartmental interference.
Ag= I have ways of making you talk Erzulie, and they don't involve sunshine and rainbows.
E= I found a way to cut Desiree and Daniel’s little weekend short.
Ag= You stupid, little-
A= Agwe, calm down! She just arranged a safe path for Tonton Julian to Gabriel Beauxhomme’s house. They way you had planned it left him drowning in a ditch a half-mile from his home!
Ag= But that means he’ll come get Daniel! You’re ruining everything! *swips things off of his desk*
A= Agwe, why are you acting like this? It’s not like you care about her; you don’t care about anyone!
Ag= Of course I care about her! I was the one who saved her; I’m the one who protects her!
PG= You’re not doing such a great job. You should pay more attention to the people you “care” about.
Ag= Was that a threat? I’ll kill you if you’ve hurt her!
PG= Ugh, you and your feelings. Since when do you feel? The humans and their emotions are rubbing off on you. We are supposed to be gods! We are untouchable; we don’t need to feel. We are in control- of everything! And you care about some silly girl- some silly, insignificant girl and her dreams of “prince charming”?
E= It’s not Ok to talk about Prince Charming like that; He was such a nice guy.
PG= You guys are so focused on these stupid little humans. They are our pawns, our game pieces! Look around you- we control everything. Your attachment to such a tiny insignificant thing is unacceptable. It’s repulsive.
A= It’s not repulsive to to care about something! This is our world, yes, but we can’t just let it die!
Ag= That’s rich coming from you. When was the last time you did your job?
A= It’s hard to do my job when one of your storms ruins something every five seconds! My job is to make things live, but you two seem to get off on destroying everything!
E= Asaka, that’s not being fair. I’m sure they try not to kill everything.
PG= No, no, no. I kill just about everything. I tried to kill that little human of yours.
Ag= you did what?!
PG= I didn’t. She claimed your guys’ protection before I could. ( Agwe should go at PG, but Asaka comes between them)
E= (aside) I must have missed that email. (checks email)
A= Guys, don’t start-
E= Awww, that’s so sweet. (points phone in boys’ direction, oblivious to their tension) She wants to trade her life for his. It’s so roman- No, the Galimar- Beauxhomme wedding will happen. I will settle this. (Exits. Agwe rushes to untangle himself from PG and follows Erzulie out)
Ag= Don’t mess with my human!( He exits)
A= (Sits down at her desk with a sigh) I don’t know what’s gotten into Agwe. He was never such a romantic before.
PG= He did send that mudslide to the Tropics for your anniversary. That was pretty romantic.
A= That killed like eight people.
PG= Exactly.
A= I just don’t understand him anymore. I’m just so tired.
PG= It’s not your job to anymore, right? Not after what you did. Isn’t it how “relationships” work? Trust and all that nonsense, right? And you shouldn’t be worrying about this anymore. You’re wilting more than usual.
A= I can’t help thinking about it! It’s just that I’m not that person, you know? But it wasn’t entirely my fault! He was ignoring me and he wasn’t there. I was just so lonely and that guy was actually paying attention to me. He wasn’t there! It’s not my fault!
PG= You sound awfully guilty for someone who wasn’t at fault. And hey, there’s nothing wrong with a little infidelity in a relationship. I’ve meet a lot of great unfaithful people, well dead unfaithful people, but they were OK for humans. Being unfaithful builds character.
A= I don’t need your sympathy. I’m so pathetic. (cries)
PG= Okay. This is too many feelings for me, so…. I’m going to go. (exits)
A=Everyone leaves me! (cries and puts head down before BLACKOUT)
Scene 2:
Asaka is sleeping with her head on the desk, tissues are strewn across her desk. E, PG, and Agwe walk through the door.
E= I can’t believe you scared her away. I was so close to convincing her to stay.
Ag: She wasn’t going to stay, no matter what you said, and you know it. (Claps Papa Ge on back) but nice push buddy, I really appreciate it.
PG: (Straightens out suspenders) that was a little too dream fulfilling for my taste. Next time you better send a typhoon or something, because I need a little more interesting than today.
A: What happened?
E: (angry) I went down there and I almost had her convinced. She was going to stay in her village, with her parents, whom she loves so dearly. I’m Erzulie, goddess of love, she was going to listen to me about her love life. Until, this hot head came and messed everything up.
Ag: I didn’t mess anything up, I just restored everything to its proper order. I am the one who has protected her, her entire life. I was just letting her decide.
Erzulie: Her decide? I was there at that meeting! I heard every word you said and I know you’re only doing this for Ah…
Ag: Erzulie! You’re calling my motives selfish? You’re only doing this, because you’re attached to some flowers and a silly dress.
E: It doesn’t matter why I’m doing it, it is my department! You have no right to be sticking your nose into it.
A: (goes over to portal) She’s all alone in the middle of the woods. What have you guys done? She might die, because you guys are bickering like children. You guys say your gods and that you’re better than them, but you’re not. This isn’t about any of us. It is about creating life, protecting life. We need to save her and make sure she’s okay. We need to make sure she doesn’t die, because you guys are being so self absorbed. I didn’t think you guys were so selfish.
(Agwe and Erzulie glare at each other)
Erzulie: Don’t worry Asaka, we will protect her. (sends email) I will go down myself, just to make sure of it.
Ag: (shoves hands in pockets) I’ll keep the storms light.
PG: But you said there would be a typhoon. (more whiny than usual)
A: I’m going to make sure there are tree’s tonight to protect her.
(E and A look at the portal, Agwe is standing behind them) (Fades to black)
Scene 3:
(Scene opens on Asaka and Agwe with a popcorn bowl between them looking into the portal to Earth)
A= She looks so happy, so beautiful.
Ag= This is what I wanted for her. She’s more important than that village was going to make her seem. She’s shines brighter than everyone down there. No one can help staring at her.
A= I remember when her mother left her. You put her in my tree.
Ag= I knew you would protect her.
A= That’s when you used to trust me.
Ag= I don’t want to talk about it.
A= We can’t keep ignoring it. It’s eating at you, I can tell.
Ag= It’s just why? I didn’t think it was going that badly. Am I really that bad of a guy?
A= No, Agwe it isn’t your fault. I keep trying to think of ways to blame you, but I should have just talked to you.
Ag= I wasn’t listening, though. It’s my-
A= No, it’s not. It’s my fault and we both know it.
Ag= Asaka-
A= Don’t, okay? Just don’t. (Erzulie enters)
E= What’s going on?
A= Desiree’s dancing. She looks so happy. They look so happy.
E= Asaka, you know they can’t work. Andrea’s coming back in a few days.
A= Why? Why can’t they work? They love each other!
E= Not real love. They are obsessed with the idea of each other.
A= Who are you to judge what is love and what isn’t? You’ve never even been in love! You’re just jealous!
E= Asaka! What’s gotten into you!
A= You couldn’t understand!( Asaka exits. PG enters)
PG= Is this about Desiree? That girl is more trouble than she’s worth.
Ag= No, she’s not. She’s going to save us all.
PG= Us or you and Asaka’s relationship?
Ag= You don’t know what you’re talking about.
PG= I think I do. This whole Desiree situation started because you wanted her back.
Ag= Shut your mouth!
E= I heard you at the summons. I know you’re doing this for her.
Ag= She’s been so sad and I’ve been so angry. There’s been so much death and this is supposed to be a good thing. It’ supposed to make her happy. I’m still in love with her; I want her to be happy.
E= This isn’t what’s going to fix you. Andrea and Daniel are getting married, but that doesn’t mean you and Asaka are over. (Blackout)
Scene 4:
(Everyone is in their places but Asaka, who storms in)
A= He left her behind. They should have been happy together, but because of you, he left her behind!
E= Asaka, this is what has been planned for centuries! Some things are unavoidable.
A= You and your plans! How can you not care? Not everything is about playing the game; these are people!
E= We are gods!
PG= Preach!
E= Our job is to move life along its path. Some things have been decided and we can’t change them.
A= But you can change this! You can!
E= Not without disrupting something else. Life is a delicate balance and this could destroy it!
A= But she was going to be happy. She was finally going to be happy.
Ag= Asaka-
A= Things were going to work out for her-
Ag= Asaka-
A= Daniel would have been happy too-
Ag= Asaka, stop it. I love you. We can be happy. I interfered with Desiree to try to make you happy again, but we can be happy without them. We can be happy together.
A= Really?
Ag= Really.
E= (crying) Can I plan the wedding?
PG= Well it’s a good thing you don’t need her anymore because she’s dead.
(Everyone looks at him in shock) (Black out)
THE END
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